Quality Veteran of the Week

Halle Berry, 42


OK OK I know I've been a little late with this weeks QV and I know you were holding your breath for this weeks selection. It was worth the wait because this weeks selection is Halle Berry, one of the sexiest women to set foot on earth. The NFL draft is coming up and the major debate, usually at the top of the draft, is wether to take the QB with the high ceiling or go for the safe pick and take that left tackle your squad needs to anchor the line. In this case, I went with the safe pick and went with an absolute lock to be a big hit as the QV this week. If you don't find Halle Berry attractive go play in traffic or have somebody go Lorena Bobbit on you because you don't deserve a dick. Berry is that kind of player that you know is going to deliever for a long time. She's been doing it better as of late with recent movies such as Swordfish and Monster's Ball. If you haven't checked her out in Monster's Ball you are flat missing out on some of her best work (sex scene) warning: nudity. The only bummer is that Billy Bob Thorthon is rubbing his old balls all over her. What's with this guy, first he's nailing Angelina Jolie and then he's rubbing his garbage all over a naked Halle Berry. If I ever hear this clown complain about anything in his life I will personally punch him in the throat.

Quality Veteran of the Week

SUZY KOLBER, 44


She is synonymous with NFL football and sex appeal. This week's QV is Suzy Kolber, a sideline reporter for ESPN's Monday Night Football. Any chick that is sexy and can explain to you the cover 2 is an absolute 10 in my book. She might not have all the physical characteristics that some of the other QVs have had but its the mental edge that she possesses which keeps her performing at a high level. She's got the toughness and wherewithal to look hot and dodge Broadway Joe's famous druken rape attempt on the sidelines of a Monday Night game. The only one who was Sssstrrruuuuuggglllinng was Joe. Suzy, even when being brushed back by a high hard one, still dug back in and got the job done. Handled in the way a classy lady like her should. As long as she's looking good and still giving us the inside look into what's going on down on the sidelines she will remain a top performer.

Quality Veteran of the Week

Mariska Hargitay, 44

This weeks QV is the emmy award winning actress Mariska Hargitay from the hit show Law and Order : Special Victims Unit. She plays the role of detective Olivia Benson. What can I say about Mariska that you can't see for yourself. Anyone can watch her out there and no what makes her special. She's been able to get it done with long hair and can even pull off the butch look she's rocking in the show. She's the type of vet that you want your kids to hurry up and get a chance to see her before she begins to fade. We want to see her in her prime not 10 years from now with a brood of squirts pulling at her shirt while she trys to make a comeback. Make sure you check her out now before she turns into Montana with the Chiefs, Rice with the Radiers/Broncos, Jordan with the Wizards, etc. This might be inevitable knowing that she recently has had a kid and now her career taking a back seat is quite possible. Also, the way TV is these days you can be hot shit one minute then cold piss the next. So for your sake, for your loved ones sake make sure you take the time to see Mariska in action before it's too late.

Quality Veteran of the Week

Ashley Judd

Ok with all of these rumors and nonsense flying around about the coaching position at Kentucky I thought that this weeks QV would maybe get our minds off of it for a couple minutes but like all the others I've gotten sucked back in and decided to follow the theme this week. So this weeks QV goes to actress Ashley Judd, age 40. The famed Kentucky Basketball fanatic is a no brainer. It also might be an omen that she just turned 40 several months ago qualifying her for this honor during this week. She's the type of QV that no matter how things are going in the season she always going to be the one telling you to keep your head up and there is plenty of time left to turn the season around(get that body right just in time for beach season). She's the one who believes it's not over till the clock hits triple zero and that tanking it to get a better draft pick is unacceptable. While the game is out of reach and everyone is else cheesing it up on the bench talking about next week she is reminding you that there is still 1:03 on the clock and you are only up 48. Just the kind of girl I want keeping my rookies heads in the game and to remind them to keep grinding. I'll be honest I've always thought she was a tad overrated but any girl looks better in blue. Am I right fellas?

Quality Veteran of the Week

Lori Loughlin


QV of the week this week goes to Lori Loughlin or "Becky" from Full House. Coming into this season she is age 44 but with the bod that looks like its her 20's. What can you say about this veteran other than she is still putting in good minutes. She might not be the starter she once was but shes that kind of vet that can give you that extra push to the next level. She's the James Posey(glue girl) of my veteran squad. Still flat out bangin. Jesse Katsopolis can suck it and thank God he was hitting this.

Quality Veteran of the Week: St. Patty's Edition

In honor of St. Patty's day I bring you a special edition of Quality Veteran of the Week and present you with not one but three lovely redheaded veterans. A traditional clover has 3 leaves therefor we have 3 vets for this week with all of them rocking the red locks. From left to right we have Jane Seymour(age 54), Marg Helgenberger(age 44), and Nicole Kidman(age 41). You should recognize Jane Seymour as Doctor Quinn Medicine Woman or as "kitty cat" from Wedding crashers. Marg Helgenberger is getting it done as Catherine Willows on CSI. Finally, Nicole Kidman and if you don't know who she is you either live in Cambodia or were in a terrible car accident and have no brain function.

If you are a redhead there is no middle ground either you are smokin' hot or you are struggling ... it's science. These 3 my friends would be from the smokin' hot group. They are kind of like those veterans that though they might not have been given those natural skills (brunette, blond hair) They put in the extra effort to compete at a high level. These are my David Eckstein type of vets.

Quality Veteran of the Week

TIA CARRERE


This weeks quality veteran status goes to Tia Carrere. Most of you probably know her as Cassandra from Wayne's World. She has also been in movies such as True Lies with Arnold Schwarzenegger. At age 42 she is on the younger end of quality vets but still qualifies. She's got that Asian flare that I like in my line up not too flashy or out spoken in the clubhouse just comes to the park everyday and is a pro's pro when it comes to looking dime. She's the type of vet you can plug into the middle of the order and is still going to give you what you need. She is still bringing it even after disappearing for the most part after Wayne's World. One of my personal favorites.... SHE WAS MY FIRST ASIAN!!!

Quality Veteran of the Week

SALMA HAYEK

This week's quality veteran putting in as good of work as ever is Salma Hayek. This one is a no brainer. The 42 year old Hayek is still flat out, no questions asked getting the job done. This is one of those quality veterans that has definitely not lost a step and still continues to produce at an extremely high level. Makes you kinda wonder how she is keeping her performance from dipping like so many veterans her age. She's Latino which could mean she has been lying about her age when she first came up through the farm system to get to the big show quicker(Albert Pujols). It also might be the same way the rocket came out of no where to post a sub 2 ERA when many thought at his age it was impossible to bring that kind of gas. She wasn't in the Mitchell Report so I have no basis to accuse. I'll just sit back and continue to enjoy the quality at bats she is still giving us. I also urge you to check out Desperado starring her and Antonio Banderas, not only is it a sweet flick but she is definitely "on top" of her game in this one and From Dusk till Dawn. I haven't seen it but I hear good things.



Also this guy thinks that Meeks and Patterson are gone after the season and hates Billy G

Quality Veteran of the Week

JULIA LOUIS-DREYFUS

I'm going to try out a new weekly post called Quality Veteran of the Week. Allow me to explain. A quality veteran in sporting terms is some one that's been around the game for awhile and is in his declining years as a player but can still give you that leadership and quality play that you expect. He's someone that when called upon can still come in an get the job done and that you can rely on even if they are no longer in their prime. Well as classy as I am I'm going to relate this quality veteran status to women. The women that I select each week are going to be women who have been around the game for a while and though they may not be what they once were in the looks department are still flat out getting the job done. Criteria to become a quality vet are as follows: must be over 40 years old, must have had some significance and success in years prior, and they still gotta be giving us quality minutes in looks/sex appeal. These women are not necessarily MILFs. I just want to get that straight.

So with that being said my inaugural quality vet is non other that Julia Louis-Dreyfus or you might know her as Elaine Benes from the hit show Seinfeld. At a ripe 48 years old she is still putting in the work and getting it done on a day to day basis. She is one of the rare quality vets that peaked late in her career. I am referring to the early episodes were shes really struggling with that bad 80's hair and scrunchies. Although she struggled early, she corrected those mistakes an started producing in the late 90's and is still out there doing the little things to stay on top of her game.

feel free to give me some feedback as to if I should keep doing this post on a weekly basis. disagreeing is also encouraged but surely I'm not the only one that is still digging her