DECEMBER 1--A Wisconsin teenager who described herself as a "skankagent" is facing felony charges for allegedly using Craigslist to rob prospective johns looking for sex. According to a circuit court complaint filed yesterday, Samantha Stubbe, 17, last month placed an ad in the online classified site's "Adult Gigs" section offering sexual favors in return for an apartment. After men were lured to a Fond du Lac motel for a purported liaison, Stubbe's male friends attacked them and stole their money. Stubbe, pictured below in the mug shot at right, was aided in the scheme by Stevi Smet, 18, who served as the female decoy outside the motel. Smet is pictured below at left. When questioned by police, Stubbe admitted orchestrating the strong-arm robbery scheme, but told Detective Steve Kaufman that "she would not consider herself a pimp but a 'skank agent,' meaning that she was an agent with skanky friends." Since state criminal codes do not address skank agentry, Stubbe was charged with soliciting prostitution and armed robbery. Smet, also charged with armed robbery, is facing a prostitution rap for allegedly having sex with a man who answered the Craigslist ad. The man, 19, told cops that he paid for Smet's services with a $175 check.
You know this story is not really one that grabs your attention... Really it's as common as that inaugural handjob at the movie theater in the seventh grade. I mean it's something you'd expect to read on a Wednesday in the "Police Beat" of the Union County Advocate. Everyday you hear about dirty little tramps on Myspeiz or Craiglist slutting it up to pay the rent... I mean how do you think the Pecker manages the pay for his Manhattan digs? But this story take a turn and when I say a turn I mean a fucking "90 degree, hold on to your dick, Fast and the Furious - Tokyo Drift" turn towards Pulitzer gold when the term "Shank Agent" gets referenced. I mean only once every decade or so is perfect urban diction created in the sense that it appeases the literary gods and today ladies and gentleman is one of those days. So move over Pimps, Hutsler's and Baller's of the world because the "Skank Agent" has arrived. Now try and say it three time fast. CLJ
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